[imeeji - IC inbox]

[maleficafe]

"This is Lavender. Leave a message and I'll get back to you."

Comments

day 172, late morning

[foolmetwice]

Mars: why is your team the way that they are

Re: day 172, late morning

[maleficafe]

Lavender: I don't understand the question?

Re: day 172, late morning

[foolmetwice]

[UGH]

Mars: i stopped by for tea
Mars: like you asked me to
Mars: but you weren't there so i said i'd leave
Mars: but they gave me tea anyway?
Mars: also you have a new girl

Re: day 172, late morning

[maleficafe]

[there's a long pause before her next reply comes]

Lavender: I'm sorry I wasn't there.
Lavender: It's not usually like this.
Lavender: I hope everyone treated you well anyway.

Re: day 172, late morning

[foolmetwice]

Mars: that's the problem!!!!
Mars: they were too NICE!!!!

Re: day 172, late morning

[maleficafe]

Lavender: You must not have met John, then.

Re: day 172, late morning

[foolmetwice]

Mars: oh no, i've met him
Mars: but i wasn't talking about him

Re: day 172, late morning

[maleficafe]

Lavender: Did they feed you cookies?

Re: day 172, late morning

[foolmetwice]

Mars: yes
Mars: where are you right now, anyway?

Re: day 172, late morning

[maleficafe]

Lavender: sensitIV.
Lavender: I'm not sure when I'll be back.

[lavender is typing... appears for a bit, then disappears]

Re: day 172, late morning

[foolmetwice]

Mars: why not?

Re: day 172, late morning

[maleficafe]

[lavender is typing... appears and disappears several times]

Lavender: It would be a problem.

Re: day 172, late morning

[foolmetwice]

Mars: whyyyyy?

Re: day 172, late morning

[maleficafe]

Lavender: Things would get ugly. People might get hurt.
Lavender: I don't want to make LiliS go through that.
Lavender: Not even

Re: day 172, late morning

[foolmetwice]

[. . . did he miss something?]

Mars: what happened?

Re: day 172, late morning

[maleficafe]

Lavender: I got into a fight with John.
Lavender: By the end of it I think he wanted to hurt me.
Lavender: If I still had my Craft, I know I would have hurt him.
Lavender: He thinks I'm
Lavender: I can't go back right now.
Lavender: So I'm staying away.
Lavender: Until I can figure out what to do.
Lavender: Or just

[lavender is typing...

lavender is typing...

nothing.]

Re: day 172, late morning

[foolmetwice]

[whoa]

Mars: i dunno
Mars: john seems like the type who is kind of a jerk?
Mars: maybe there was a misunderstanding?
Mars: you shouldn't have to stay somewhere else when lilis is your home

Re: day 172, late morning

[maleficafe]

Lavender: I don't want to be the person that pushes him out.
Lavender: He wants to be here. He just hates me.
Lavender: Do you think I'd make a good hero?

Re: day 172, late morning

[foolmetwice]

Mars: we're not heroes over at heart
Mars: but do i think you'd be good with us?
Mars: yeah, i do
Mars: but before you look at that option
Mars: how the fuck could john hate someone like you?

Re: day 172, late morning

[maleficafe]

Lavender: It's not like it's out of the blue.
Lavender: I haven't been good with him. Every time I've tried to reach out to him, I mess up and make things worse.
Lavender: And apparently he was trying to protect me and I didn't notice.
Lavender: Because at some point it just seemed hopeless and I stopped paying attention.
Lavender: He didn't want anyone in. He didn't want anyone to care about him.
Lavender: So he's punishing me for caring about him.
Lavender: He said really hurtful things about me.
Lavender: And I know he was wrong, but it doesn't matter as long as he believes it.
Lavender: I never should have tried to be friends with him in the first place.
Lavender: But I couldn't just ignore him.
Lavender: I wanted to be close. He reminds me so much of Amon.
Lavender: It's my fault for seeing someone else in him.
Lavender: How am I supposed to go back when I feel this way?
Lavender: I don't know what to do

Re: day 172, late morning

[foolmetwice]

[whoa whoa WHOA]

[SUDDEN RIGHTEOUS INDIGNATION]

Mars: punishing you for CARING about him???
Mars: you realize that makes HIM the asshole, not you, right??
Mars: if anyone should be kicked out of lilis it's him
Mars: for being a huge dick

Re: day 172, late morning

[maleficafe]

Lavender: He's already in trouble with the Producers for avoiding and ignoring most of LiliS.
Lavender: So he was reaching out to try and make it better.
Lavender: And then he accused me of making it hard for him to reach out.
Lavender: Because I'd just sort of given up on him.
Lavender: It all kind of went downhill from there.

[...]

Lavender: If I tell you something, will you promise to keep it a secret?

Re: day 172, late morning

[foolmetwice]

Mars: that's HIS problem
Mars: not yours
Mars: you said you tried to reach out to him and that he didn't want you to care about him
Mars: he can't get angry at you for "making it hard to reach out" while also being angry at you for even trying in the first place

[. . .]

Mars: and sure
Mars: i promise

Re: day 172, late morning

[maleficafe]

Lavender: That's what I thought, too.
Lavender: I'm thinking of finding somewhere in the city with no people and just staying there until I fade away.
Lavender: That way, when I try to come back, I can be on a different unit.
Lavender: And John won't have to deal with me.
Lavender: Maybe I can find Lily that way, too. I could bring him back.
Lavender: I know it seems bad but it's starting to sound like the best option.

Re: day 172, late morning

[foolmetwice]

[. . . . . . LAVENDER!!!]

Mars: do you know what i think you should do?